Have you heard of many long term relationships? We, for one, only know of a few. Having been in quite a few relationships ourselves, we have to say, it’s little wonder why there are so few relationships that tend to last for longer periods of time. When you initially enter in to a relationship, your only desire is to make the other person happy and do things their way.
With the passage of time, this desire tends to fade away. If you are living with the other person, this concept applies, too. At first, you will be very engaged and committed towards them. You will do things just as they ask you to, and you will be willing to compromise upon your own needs in order to service theirs. However, as months roll by and the relationship turns one year old or more, things begin to change.
No longer do you prioritize your partner’s needs above your own. You either try to create a balance or you try favoring yourself more. No longer are you willing to get in to bed the minute he or she beckons. Previously, when a relationship is in its initial stages, all you had to do was to give a signal for sex, and both of you would be excited and ready.
If you come home tired after work, sex with your partner used to actually freshen you up. Now, you just feel like lying on the bed and dozing off to sleep. So, the question is, what can you do in order to bring sex back in to your long term relationship?
Well, here are 10 tips to get you started:
1. Feel Pretty Yourself First
You can’t really enjoy sex if you don’t think both of you are in to it. Importantly, you can’t have great sex unless you feel sexy yourself. So, the first thing that you need to do is to give yourself some pampering. Go out to a beauty parlor and get a makeover. If you can’t afford to, give yourself an at-home manicure or new hairdo, and get yourself looking all pretty. Then, just to top it off, buy some new lingerie to bring the boom back in to your relationship. Or, find some sexy pieces you haven’t worn in a while. You need your man to bring back the memories of what it was all about, to take you with the same gusto that he would before, and nothing does it better than bringing a change.2. Start Flirting
Remember the time when the two of you began dating? How cute was it when he would send you text messages?
Give you a call at random times and you would talk about all the pointless things in the world as if they were the most important. Well, you need to bring that back. Start sending each other flirtatious messages.
Tell him what you are wearing. Make the messages sexy. You need your messages to take his attention off from whatever he is doing and focus just on you. So, make sure you have got some really nice things to say. Make him come running back to you as fast as he can at the end of the day.
3. Set Up a Foreplay Only Rule
Continuous sex can get boring, we get that. So why not set up a foreplay-only rule? Set up an agreement with the both of you which dictates that you will only kiss and engage in foreplay. No sex involved, at least for a certain period of time. This will lead to a charge for both of your libidos, and will make him crave for the day when he can take you. In the beginning, this rule can be difficult to follow. But if you persist with it, the end results will be nothing short of amazing. Your sex drive will be recharged and both of you will begin to appreciate the time that you spend with each other in bed.4. Watch an Erotic Movie
We have said erotic movie, and by that we do not mean hardcore porn. It is not necessary that you watch hardcore porn with each other. Let’s tell you this: that stuff sets unreasonably high standards and they are fake as anything.
It will only ruin your experience in bed. Instead, try watching an erotic movie that leaves both of you hot and horny at the end of it. There are a number of such movies, some of which include Body Heat, Last Tango in Paris and Like Water for Chocolate.
Run a search on the internet to get an idea of other movies that you can watch with your partner. Watching an erotic movie that has you watching others make love automatically triggers the brain to make comparisons. It will make you realize how much better your relationship is. Naturally, when you engage with your partner, it will be even better.
5. Try New Sex Positions
[adsanity id=”49837″ align=”aligncenter” /]Bored of the same missionary position day in and day out? There is a whole book dedicated to sexual positions: the Kama Sutra. So why not try something new in bed? Take to the internet and find out some different positions to try in bed. Did you know that even the standard missionary position has over 10 different types of variations? A lot of people report that one of the main reasons their sex life becomes boring is because of the lack of innovation in bed. Try new positions, and who knows: you both might even reach a new level of orgasm.
6. Show, Not Tell
When at home, wear no underwear. But, don’t tell your man that. Let him guess on his own. If sees your nipples through your dress, or what’s underneath as you lift your legs or bend, he will automatically be attracted towards you.
Rather than telling him yourself, let the man guess on his own. Once he does, you will see a much greater sex drive in him than before. This is just one of the many things that you can do to attract his attention in bed.
6. Show, Not Tell7. Have Sex in Different Places
After a while, the bed becomes pretty boring. So, why not change that? Choose a different place to have sex. Do it on the couch, the drawing room, the kitchen or on the table. It doesn’t matter where you do it, as long as it’s a new experience. You have a whole house to yourself, so avail yourself of it. Be creative and have fun. Having sex in different places is like a new experience for a person, and it is an experience that will really enhance your sexual drive.8. Sensuous Kissing
Think to yourself: when was the last time you and your partner really had a good, long kiss? The answer might even surprise you.
Most people don’t realize it, but the standard goodnight kisses do not really constitute as sensuous kisses. When was the last time you and your partner had a lusty, romantic kiss that went on for a long time?
It has to be a long, long while since that happened. Well, now’s the time to change it. Kissing brings two people closer, and it will also make you fall deeper in love with each other. Get started on kissing each other for longer periods of time, and you will really begin to enjoy it.
9. Massages and Caresses
Massages are a great way to unwind after a long and tiring day. And, there are few things better than a good massage given by your partner. Take off your clothes, lie on the bed and ask your partner to massage your body. Get some good quality oils to rub on your body, and let your partner do the job. The gentle rubbing and sensation that you get from the massage will help improve the connection between the two of you, and bring you closer. Importantly, massages also release hormones in the body and make you realize that the other partner thinks of you and cares for you. A gentle grazing of the arm, kiss on the neck or cheeks, or on the forehead are just some of the ways to further complement the situation.10. Treat Him or Her Well
Being thoughtful and considerate will get you places, and it will help maintain the love in your relationship, too.
Put a note in his lunch box or toolbox. Give him a big hug at the end of the day. Even a warm smile can go a long way to showing him you love and appreciate him.
Open the door for her, pull a chair out for her, and generally treat her as well as you can. The better you do this, the more it will make her realize that even after all this time, you still care for her. As a result, she will obviously be more attracted to you than ever before.
